I am sure you would have heard this statement at least once, if not more often in your life time. Often, you hear this if you are bitching about your boss or your in-laws or your siblings or your colleagues or even friends. Basically, the situation can be professional, personal or social…The only criteria is that both parties involved are women, and then the listener (gender agnostically) often responds with this statement.
My response to this factual rubbish varies depending on who says it, what the context is, what frame of mind I am in etc..
But, the focus on this post is on why this is factually wrong. First of all, I feel that the herd mentality ingrained in our psyches expect that birds of a feather flock together and by extension, all women should always stand together and support each other. However, the whole idea of feminism is to make people think beyond gender…So, women are not all birds of the same feather…Yes, biologically women are more similar to each other than to men, but that’s about it…You will find women in all colours – nice to horrible – just as you would find men.
Social conditioning, economic situations, level of education and so many other factors determine how I perceive, tackle and respond to any given situation. As a result, my (or any person’s) response may be more similar to others with same exposure to similar experiences…regardless of gender…I may tend to agree with/act like/think like a guy more than a lady in certain situations – but that does not mean I am a lady’s enemy. Again depends on which guy and which lady is in question. From my limited experience, I have not seen m-i-ls being more stuck up than f-i-ls..It is just that their areas of focus may be different. But both can be understanding or pig headed depending on what is being discussed and what the stakes are – again it is gender neutral. Same with bosses, siblings, friends, enemies and strangers.
Probably the only area where gender will have an influence is the physical capability requirements. Again, I have seen men who can’t carry a sick child or any other heavy load – we call them insensitive in the formal case and lovingly call them metrosexual in the latter case …but maybe they are just not trained. A rural woman is likely to be more physically strong than a pampered city male…again gender neutral ! Yes, by default, there are hormonal and biological differences, but circumstances and social conditioning also have a huge role.
So, the next time you feel like responding with a “Yea, after all women are a woman’s worst enemy”, please stop and think beyond.